Tuesday, June 21, 2011

A Serious Talk With God

He is here for the broken and life to the one who is undone. He is peace to the wounded and hope for the hopeless one.

If you know the song I am reciting you know what comes along in the next few lines. Oh, for my soul to be still. Be still and know that He is God.

You would think after a nice beach vacation my soul and strength would be renewed and re-energized. But oh contrary. I am finding it hard to rest in the role I am presented with. I feel uneasy and displeased with a lot of things that are not normally that way. I am feeling angst with my position at work. Lull may be the better term. I am feeling resentment and bitterness with my role as a parent in this household. All things that are just too deep and disturbing to go into details.

I had a long, serious talk with God this morning. A good friend once told me to tell God how I am feeling even when it is bad. He already knows so why try and keep it from Him. I usually start my "talks" with God out with thanksgiving. Just a matter of routine, I guess. But this morning my words were something like this...I am reluctantly digging down very deep to find some kind of thankfulness. So, I started with the obvious. Thank you for giving your life for me. Thank you for saving my soul and forgiving me of my short-comings (like not having a lot to be thankful for!). Thank you for my mom and dad and my husband and kids. But that is about all I could get out without just wanting to let loose of a lot of anger.

It is not real clear to me what I am so out of sorts about. I remember feeling this way when God was beginning to speak to me about changing church homes. But I can't imagine what He is wanting to do in me now. I suppose I should be happy that He is just not done with me!

This post has gone nothing like what I started it out to be. I was going to tell you all about Presley's doctors appointment tomorrow. But I guess that will have to wait until another day. Just be in prayer for us, please!

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